If I Could Turn Back Tiiiiaaaaaommm


If I could turn back some time, I would go see Cher 15 years ago when I was in high school. Since I can’t, I went recently to her fourth (or is it fifth) farewell tour. It was FANTASTIC! Our seats were at the front of the top bowl and we were surrounded by lesbian couples. When I say surrounded, I mean like Husbando was seriously the only guy within 4 rows. I love to people-watch so by the end I had deduced that every single couple was indeed a couple and not half of them sisters/friends like I originally assumed. Where were all the gay guys? They were taking up the entire floor section. Guess women are more practical with their spending. No shock there.

But then Husbando almost got us kicked out of the concert.

Cher’s very unique and distinct voice came over the loudspeaker saying she would be out in a while, can’t wait to have fun, blah blah blah. Everyone shouts in excitement then it gets quiet again. Husbando turns to me and actually has the guts to ask OUT LOUD who that was. He didn’t even ask it quietly! I just looked at him silently for a solid 20 seconds with my eyes wide and lower jaw in my lap. The nice couple in front of us AND beside him all four turned around and stared at me because I was obviously responsible for this. I just looked at all of them with my mouth still open until one said ‘Did he really just ask that?’ I tried to act like he was joking. I looked at him and give him a look that indicated he BETTER pretend he was or these angry women who worship Cher were going to kill us both. After that he tried (and failed) to pretend he just didn’t realize it was her because of the acoustics. Bless that man’s heart.

Luckily  no one shanked him and we were able to enjoy the concert in peace. It really was magical and I can’t imagine it could have been any better way back in high school so I don’t think I missed out on anything. Aren’t Bucket List checks the best?!


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