Adventures with Hef – Part I


Picture this. Cato, 2012. With a long night of scrapbooking ahead of us, Hef and I stop by the local Cato store before we haul all of our craft supplies into the scrapbook store next door. While cruising the sale racks I hear a squeal. Then giggling. Then snorting. Hef is standing there holding up this:


So then I start the same squeal/giggle/snort thing followed with the inevitable question, “HOW MUCH IS THAT?!” Answer? $5.99. Well that was it. I had to own it because I would OBVIOUSLY look like a supermodel similar to:


I mean, a 3X parachute-sized piece of animal print material is totally flattering, right? And cheetah is so in this year, right? And we will wear these all the time, right? In the dressing room it gets better. They fit and WAIT… it gets even better… IT HAS POCKETS! Perfection. We are going to ROCK these rompers!

Fast forward to the next afternoon. The bag comes out and the romper goes on. I stand in front of my mirror and find this:


What… the… heck…? Cato, your magic mirrors will never fool me again! Until the next time Hef finds me something on the clearance rack. “Are those $1.99 pleather snakeskin leggings?!”


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