Due Process


Thank you to everyone for all the sweet things you said about the last blog. We are really happy to be doing this with so many supporters! We will see how supportive you are when I need babysitters. On the adoption note, I wanted to give you a vague timeline of how this all goes. When I filled out the info packet request online we were assigned to a Recruiter. Before we even got our packet she called and asked if we had received it and did we want to move forward. I said yes but we have no packet still and it has been two weeks. So she sent out another packet and one Thursday night stuff got real y’all. A giant manilla envelope was the only thing in our normally bill and junkmail-filled mailbox. It was as if nothing else was good enough to share the box that day. So I squeeled all the way up the driveway only to find Husbando had not only gone inside but was already in the bathroom. The following conversation took place and is a good preface to my paragraph on patience that is coming up.

Me: *taking phone pics of the envelope on the kitchen floor*

Husbando (in bathroom): YOU BETTER NOT OPEN THAT WITHOUT ME!

Me: *tearing tiny hole in corner*

Husbando: I MEAN IT!



Me: *tiny hole gets bigger*




Husbando: *shouts jumbled expletives similar to a Honey Boo Boo scene*


Husbando: *appears in doorway obviously winded, hands still dripping from washing but not drying them*  Ok, I’m here.

Me: You didn’t wash your hands.

Husbando: *biggest eye roll of your life* Yes I did.

Me: Its okay, I can wait. There is no hurry.

Husbando: *I was wrong, new biggest eye roll of your life* I DID.

Me: There is no need to rush.

Husbando: Open it.

Me:*rips the package full open and our life may never be the same again*

Packet contained one huge application, testimonials, pamphlets, a 2-hour movie and a letter. We stuck the DVD in the laptop and watched it in bed while we sorted through all the other papers. The application was about 20 pages but most of this we don’t have to fill out because it wants all kinds of info about current kids. Guess what, we don’t have any! Also, it wants a contact at their schools. Guess what, we don’t have any! It wants every grown child we have ever had and guess what… we don’t have any! So really it was about 10 pages and includes our basic life info. We have to have six references and three need to write letters. And by ‘write letters’ they mean fill out a form. The three-page form has several questions with three lines under each question to fill in an answer. First off, I write huge so that wouldn’t work for me. Next, people need several lines to explain how awesome we are even if they type it. Last, what if they REALLY want to talk about how much I like Bouncy Castles because it seems relevant?

We need to gather SEVERAL things just to submit our application including social security cards (God, please hear this prayer and send Husbando his since HE CAN’T FIND IT), drivers licenses, car insurance cards, pay stubs, etc. Then we call and tell them we’re done. Well, I did call and tell them we’re done. Man, I suck at this tense thing. I called them and the recruiter lady told me someone would call and schedule our homestudy soon. So do they mean they’ll call soon to schedule it for May or they’ll call soon to schedule it tomorrow? No clue. Just waiting for a week now to hear what the plan is. Now is when I talk about patience. I have about none. Well maybe as much as say… a moth. So this will be my ultimate test. One thing on tv that is actually 100% true is that the  DHS system is under-funded, over-worked and things take a much longer time than it should. My recruiter said there are only two people that do home visits in our area. That seems low. No wonder it takes so long for things to happen. But I am going into this knowing everything is going to be strung out and knowing that will at least prepare me better.

At the homestudy our caseworker will take our application and all the additional stuff we have collected. She will check our house (hide the recreational drugs, check), go over an orientation discussion, schedule our 27 hour training (which I picture going similar to the birthing class in Baby Mama) and then give us a new batch of things to submit. Forms from employers, reference letter forms, physicians notes, our fingerprint cards and background check releases. They will then start processing all the info and waiting for all the other forms to be turned in to them. have these people heard of email? Or an online form? Guess not. The IT guy is probably too busy out doing homestudies.

Once that very long process is complete they will begin looking for children they think are a good fit for us. From what I’ve read, there may be a meet-and-greet kind of thing first then maybe a weekend visit where the kids would come for a couple days to see how we all feel about each other. After that we could be matched or we could part ways knowing this wasn’t the group for us and start the placement part over. Start to finish is said to be 9-12 months so that is what I keep telling myself it will be. Secretly I think it would be fun to be 9 months so its similar to a pregnancy. I tell you, the things I come up with are crazy.

I promise you all that these blogs won’t always be so long. I have several memes waiting for their turn in the sun. Some even have cats. Try to contain your excitement.


2 responses »

  1. In my defense I know where my card is. Just neither of us know where the object that holds the card is. Please come help us find it. PLEASSSSSSSEEEEEE

  2. I said a prayer to St. Anthony, patron saint of lost stuff: “Tony, Tony, look around. Something’s lost and can’t be found.” Hey, give me a break. It’s what they taught us in elementary school.
    Token Catholic Friend

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